You don’t understand officer. That was some of the best weed I’ve ever smoked…
SHARONVILLE, Ohio – An Ohio man called his local department and demanded that officers relinquish the marijuana that they ‘stole’ from his wife’s purse during a run in with police the night before, according to Cleveland.com.
The Sharonville Police Department took to Facebook to post the hilarious recorded phone call on Wednesday afternoon.
“After a long weekend of holiday trips and lazy daze spent with all your best buds, we hope your spirits are just as high as ours to return to work today!” the department’s post read.
They were sure to be crafty and managed to weave plenty of witty puns into the post.
“As a result of a recently received complaint, a misconception around the use and possession of marijuana has come to our attention,” the post continued. “We feel that some people may be a bit in the weeds so we would like to take this opportunity to clear the haze.”
According the story, the man, who wasn’t identified but briefly said that his wife was Marylin Manson, told the sergeant on the phone that he wanted the bud back because it was… like… really good weed.
He said that two officers with the department had taken the pot the previous evening.
“I had two cops come here last night and steal my f—ing weed and I want it back,” the man can be heard saying. “It’s only like 4 grams but it was really good f—ing weed. It was only like 4 grams, but it was like prestige f—ing weed.”
He went on to tell the sergeant that what the cops did was wrong, and that Ohio state law allowed him to possess up to 100 grams of marijuana legally for recreational use.
He might want to check the laws again on that one…
“Am I wrong?” he asks. “You are wrong,” the sergeant responds.
He kept going.
“I know I’m right here, don’t try to talk to me like I’m dumb!” the caller says.
“But it was just f*****g weed! And those m*****f*****s stole it!”
Whoops! Sharonville Police said one man who called to complain that officers “stole his weed” must not have realized all recreational marijuana is still illegal under state law: https://t.co/WL7eGGrZBb pic.twitter.com/fDLjf1TwwN
— Local 12/WKRC-TV (@Local12) September 4, 2019
He also claims that the officers who confiscated the ‘prestige’ product just stuffed it into their own pockets.
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As the call goes on, the unidentified caller continues to try and test the sergeant’s knowledge of the law, yelling about how he knows the law. Eventually, he gets frustrated and hangs up, apparently realizing that he wasn’t going to get his bud back.
Well done, Sharonville Police. We needed the laugh.
“To be blunt, recreational marijuana is still ILLEGAL … per our STATE law. We don’t make the rules, we just took an oath to uphold them,” the post finished.
It’s ridiculous, but well worth the listen.
Check out the recording of the call right here.
Another department recently had fun with a drug bust of their own.
Tennessee officials warned of the possibility of ‘meth-gators’ roaming the sewers after a suspect attempted to flush a stash of narcotics to avoid being arrested.
In July, officers from the Loretto Police Department served a search warrant on a home on First Avenue. When they got inside, they saw their key suspect, Andy Perry, attempting to flush his stash of narcotics down the toilet, as well as several paraphernalia items.
Although they were able to stop Perry from disposing of his meth, they wanted to take a moment to address the environmental concerns behind sending drugs down the porcelain express.
Perry was arrested when the search warrant turned up 12 grams of meth, 24 fluid ounces of liquid meth, and several paraphernalia items inside the Tennessee home.
The Loretto Police Department took to Facebook to post the funny, yet honest commentary.
“Folks … please don’t flush your drugs m’kay … our sewer guys take great pride in releasing water that is cleaner than what is in the creek, but they are not really prepared for meth,” the post read. “Ducks, Geese, and other fowl frequent our treatment ponds and we shudder to think what one all hyped up on meth would do.”
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The post continued, joking that anyone looking to turn in unwanted substances could call the department and they would make sure to take care of it.
“Furthermore, if it made it far enough we could create meth-gators in Shoal Creek and the Tennessee River down in North Alabama,” police wrote. “They’ve had enough methed up animals the past few weeks without our help. So, if you need to dispose of your drugs just give us a call and we will make sure they are disposed of in the proper way.”
Props to these departments for keeping us safe and doing it with a smile… and a touch of humor.