“You can’t make this up”: Chicago is full of dumb criminals who do dumb things and commit more crimes while out on parole


Editor note: This op-ed piece contains editorial commentary that is the opinion of the writer.  NewsGguard pointed out that this article inadvertently previously omitted clear classification of editorial content in this piece.  Law Enforcement Today apologizes for any confusion this may have caused.

CHICAGO, IL- You can’t fix stupid. Then again if you’re a criminal, that’s a contradiction in terms.

CWB Chicago reports that a Chicago man showed up at the office of his parole officer this past weekend, which given how things usually go in Chicago would appear to be a step forward. The only problem is he had a drug scale and a bunch of marijuana on him when he showed up.

Anthony Hughes, 37, made that terrible life decision and was detained by Illinois Department of Corrections parole agents and notified the Chicago Police Department.

According to prosecutors, Hughes thought it a good idea to show up at his appointment while in possession of over ten ounces of marijuana among 34 baggies and containers.

Prosecutor Rhianna Biernat said investigators also found a digital scale on Hughes, along with a number of different types of empty packaging.

“I can’t imagine why you would bring 285 grams of marijuana to check in with your parole officer, including a scale, but here we are,” Judge Charles Beach asked aloud during Hughes’ bail hearing.

Biernat noted that Hughes is already on parole for Class X armed habitual criminal. Among his greatest hits includes convictions for felony unlawful use of a weapon, cocaine manufacture-delivery, and possession of a controlled substance.

Despite calling the police to arrest Hughes, the Illinois Department of Corrections has yet to take steps to revoke his parole.

“This scale and 285 grams,” Beach asked Biernat, “he literally took it into this building for his parole check?”

“That’s the information that I have,” Biernat replied.

“The irony of them not filing the parole violation on the spot. They’re gonna call law enforcement to arrest him, but not necessarily file a violation.”

“You know, Biernat confirmed, appearing a bit befuddled, “that’s the information I have, judge.”

Beach replied that “you can’t necessarily make this up.”

The judge set a $750 bail deposit for Hughes to get out of jail on the charge of felony marijuana possession.

Of course this is Chicago, and we could literally fill our pages with stories out of the Windy City.


In yet another strange case, police were called to a Bobby Wright supervised living facility last weekend after a 911 caller reported a person with a gun was inside the facility.

Upon arrival, authorities were informed that a man was upstairs pointing a gun at the TV while watching a rap video.

Upon going upstairs, officers encountered Nicholas Handy-Ambrose, 28 and asked him where the gun was. Handy-Ambrose pointed to a couch, where police found a loaded 9mm handgun, prosecutors said.

Handy-Ambrose was placed under parole supervision in June for an armed robbery rap.

His attorney said he has a degree in business from Chicago State University and sometimes goes to church…whatever that is supposed to mean.

During his court hearing, Handy-Ambrose blurted out at one point, “Excuse me! I had found that firearm sir!”

The public defender admonished him for his outburst.

“Nicholas! It’s against the advice of counsel for you to speak at this time! Just be quiet, OK?”

The judge in this case was also Beach, who agreed with prosecutors and held Handy-Ambrose held without bail.

“You were pointing the gun at the TV during a rap video. Perhaps you don’t like the video, I dunno,” Beach said.

The Illinois Department of Corrections is looking at Handy-Ambrose’s parole status in light of the new allegations, CWB Chicago wrote.

In yet another example of the broken criminal justice system in Cook County, home of Chicago, CWB Chicago reported that last weekend, a man who was out on parole crashed a car in Midtown Chicago, then stole another vehicle nearby which had a 2-year-old boy in the back seat.

Chicago Police were able to locate the stolen car, arrest the suspect and safely recover the young child in the Loop shortly afterward.

The incident began last Sunday shortly before 11 a.m. when a detective started to follow the suspect for unknown reasons. The suspect crashed the car a short time later, and then fled the scene on foot.

He wasn’t on the lam for long. Just down the street, the suspect, who was not identified, carjacked a Honda CRV in a parking lot, and took off, with the child in the back seat.

The stolen vehicle was tracked by officers , where they took him into custody. The infant was still inside the vehicle and was not injured, however was taken to a local children’s hospital as a precaution.

According to a Chicago PD source, the suspect was out on parole for a violent crime and is also subject to an out-of-state warrant for a violent crime. Officers located a loaded handgun in the initial crash vehicle, a BMW, according to an officer on the scene.

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